Wilbert -- Home for Christmas

On Friday, 12/16/11 I flew back to CA for my oldest brother's funeral.  At age 84, after a 6 weeks' struggle against brain cancer (from a scalp melanoma), he succumbed on 12/10/11.  Wilbert Ray Bentley outlived 3 prior wives, leaving 7 children, 3 steps, 31 grands and 11 great-grands.  BYU paid for my flight from Tel Aviv via  New York City.  A 3-hour layover at JFK was barely enough, as it took nearly 2 hours to change planes and terminals thru more security lines.

Driving from Oakland Airport after dark, I reached the Brentwood Holiday Inn after several wrong turns.

My brother Frank & his wife Jean came on Sunday night -- after Frank's Ward Christmas Program.

After our church services on 12/18/11, we dined at Wil's favorite restaurant -- Chili's in Brentwood.  All but one of his children came.  Cliff & Dana brought 4 of their children from Utah (left).

Amy & April (his 2 oldest daughters) celebrated their birthdays that next week.  April Johnson was a nurse and Amy -- now retired from the telephone co. -- was born on Christmas Day, 1951!

Wilbert's oldest son Bill & wife Liane came from Billings MT, joined by her lovely daughter Rose & his son Adam -- recently married to Natascha.

Wil's youngest children -- Bert and Mary Beth -- made most of the arrangements.  She was from nearby Visalia and thought of everything.

The graveside interment came first on Monday after noon, 12/19/11.  Bishop David Hull officiated and Bert offered the Family Prayer.

Clifford (who sings with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir) rehearsed with his sisters, daughter & wife Dana -- then sang "The Lord Is My Shepherd."

Amy & Bill each spoke of their father & how he showed his love for them.  Then Frank dedicated the grave -- just as I had done for Wil's 3rd wife Evelyn, buried nearby, in 2009.

An American flag (for this WW II army veteran) was carefully folded. 

It was then presented to Amy as his oldest child.

Mary Beth's ex-husband Jason Curiale arrived with their 3 children in time for the final graveside ceremonies.

All six children of Wilbert sat together at the end -- Mary Beth, Bert, Cliff, April, Bill and Amy.

Here they are again -- this time with Allison Hinkle, Evelyn's daughter.  She inherited the home and paid Wilbert's bills to the end.

All of Wilbert's attending posterity stayed for one last photo.

We left the cemetary on a cold but clear, beautiful winter day.

We made it to the Brentwood Chapel in time for 2 pm Memorial Services.

Jean (Teeny) and Mary Beth did the wonderful displays.

Bishop Hull conducted; Gordon Passey was the final speaker.  Cliff sang & Mary Beth played a piano medley.  Adam & April gave prayers. 

I gave his "Life Sketch" (eulogy), first describing how he came to be my brother.  Like the Murdock twins adopted by Joseph & Emma Smith in 1831 when their mother died, my parents raised Wilbert as their own son after his mother died in 1929.  In each case, it came exactly 3 years after the loss of their first child.

He had several lifelong passions, including gardening, basketball and scouting -- as shown on the service program.

After his mission and military service, he married Barbara Black in 1950.  They had 5 children together before divorcing due to irreconcileable differences in 1963.

In 1964 he married Lela May Smith & had 2 more children -- Wilbert Jr. & Mary Beth -- before she died in 1984.  He & Evelyn Palmer Fuller married in 1985.  They moved to Brentwood in 1999, where she died in 2009.  Wil is buried by her side.

Evelyn's daughter Allison & husband Lee Hinkle gave Wilbert compassionate care until the end.  Bill's son Adam also lived with Wil in 2009 until Adam passed the bar and joined my same law firm (Latham & Watkins).  Adam & Natascha (from Denmark) were married in 2010.

After the memorial services, a lovely meal was served in the Brentwood Ward cultural hall.  Among those staying to enjoy it was Mary Beth Curiale's family.

My return flight thru was uneventful. It was great to fly over Los Angeles, where I spent the first 10 years of my law practice.

Although I had less than 1 hour to change planes at both LAX & JFK, each time the next flight was in the same terminal & just a few steps from the prior flight.  I made it home on 12/20/11  -- before Christmas & Melissa's arrival the next day.

Funerals can be a time for joy. This one helped to unite 3 families. Wilbert was surely pleased to see so much of his posterity together -- even as he was taken "home for Christmas" (Alma 40:11-12).